FYI ~ See also our Handy Handouts | Street Giraffe page
Pick a situation in which you are struggling to connect and all you can come up with is judgments, demands, etc. (a.) Write down what you said or what you would say if you opened your mouth. (b.) Pick one commitment* (several excerpted beneath) or one intention** from the reference materials that feels relevant to the situation, and imagine applying it. Write down how your language might change if you aligned your heart with the intention or commitment you picked.
*Consciousness Transformation Community: Core Commitments
Beneath~Descriptive of NVC Consciousness (courtesy of the work of Miki Kashtan):
Core Commitments —Excerpt of a Featured Few Beneath (for list in its entirety, see our core commitments tab above):
RELATING TO MYSELF
Openness to Myself: even when I act in ways I really don’t like, I want to keep my heart open to myself. If I find myself in self-judgment, I want to seek support to reconnect with myself and hold with compassion the needs that motivate my actions.
Openness to the Full Emotional Range: even when my feelings are uncomfortable for me, I want to stay present with myself and keep my heart open to the fullness of my emotional experience. If I find myself contracting away from my experience, numb or shut down, I want to seek support to release defendedness and open to what is.
Risking my Significance: even when I am full of doubt, I want to offer myself in full to the world. If I find myself thinking that I am not important or that my actions are of no significance, I want to seek support to come back to my knowledge that my presence and my gifts matter.
ORIENTING TOWARDS OTHERS
Empathic Presence: even when others are in pain, disconnected from themselves, expressing intensity, or in judgment, I want to maintain a relaxed presence with their experience. If I find myself attempting to fix, offering advice, doing mechanical empathy, or turning my attention elsewhere, I want to seek support to regain my faith in the transformative power and the gift of just being with another.
INTERACTING WITH OTHERS
Authenticity and Vulnerability: even when I feel scared and unsure of myself, I want to share the truth that lives in me with others while maintaining care and compassion for others and for myself. If I find myself hiding or protecting, I want to seek support to embrace the opportunity to expand my sense of self and transcend shame.
RELATING TO LIFE
Accepting What Is: even when change happens (welcome or unwelcome, small or large), things fall apart, people don’t come through, or calamities take place in the world, I want to remain open to life. If I find myself contracting away from life or drawn to ideas about what should happen, I want to seek support to find a sense a peace with unmet needs, and to choose responses and actions from clarity about how I want to interact with and respond to life.