September 9, 2012 ~ Practices for Opening Our Hearts

Sunday, September 9, 2012 ~ Practices for Opening Our Hearts

Courtesy of  Miki Kashtan:
BayNVC – Growing Compassion: Building On Interdependence

Recovering from the Illusion of Perfect Trust

Tikkun Daily Blog » Some Thoughts about Trust

Miki Kashtan, “Trust, like safety, runs deep. When we don’t experience trust, as when we don’t experience safety, we shut down, protect, and hide our vulnerability.”  Read more »

• Four Practices for Opening Our Hearts

I.   Wanting Fully Without Attachment

Steps:  What I’m telling myself; What I want to happen; Underlying needs; Identify core needs; Meditate on deepest needs

II.  [Emergency] Gratitude Practice

Take time to actively imagine/replay how another contributed to my life.

III.  Embracing Difficult Emotions

When noticing our own constriction, as we resist difficult emotions (such as shame, helplessness, fear, anger – perhaps personifying the emotion as a vulnerable interior part), and instead of contracting away, we might instead envision how we might step towards our anguish, by revealing what is alive within us.  Rather than reacting to our pain, embrace moving towards what we want, as a blueprint (rather than permitting the triggering emotion to guide a reactive action).

IV.  Seeing Luminous Essence (of Another)

Connecting directly with the essence of the other person, as embodied in universal human needs.  Although we cannot know with certainty what needs motivated another’s strategy, we can acknowledge each person has similar universal human needs.  Understanding that there must be some suffering present in another, recalling times when we had a greater experience of connection with them, and mourn our sense of loss.  To imaginatively paint, as a novelist might, a plausible narrative that makes logical sense of another’s action allows us to see the humanity of all beings (which can relieve our own suffering).

Recording of Miki Kashtan’s Presentation of “Four Practices for Opening your Heart”:

BayNVC Telesummit

The Sound of Silence lyrics

“People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening…”

Paul Simon performs ‘The Sounds of Silence‘ – 9/11/2011

For more on NVC & 9/11 (as a historical/illustrative example) please see Tab-IV

Art Garfunkel:  A song about the “inability of people to communicate with one another, not particularly  internationally, but especially emotionally, so that what you see around you is people who are unable to love each other. This is called The Sound of Silence.


This entry was posted in Empathy, Practice Resources - Kashtan, Self-Connection/Meditation, Self-Responsibility, What's Up Next? and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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